by Jokes in Levels | May 2, 2025 | Level 2 |
A farmer wants to milk a cow in the barn. He puts his chair next to the cow and the bucket below it. As he starts milking the cow, she kicks the bucket with her left leg. After a while, the farmer is angry and takes a rope to fix the cow’s leg to a pole. But before he can start milking again, the cow kicks the bucket with her right leg. So the farmer fixes the right leg to another pole.
The farmer wants to start milking again, but now the cow is hitting him with her tail. He decides to fix the tail to the roof. He puts the chair behind the cow and he steps on it. But he has no rope, so he takes off his belt to fix the tail. So as he is holding the cow’s tail in one hand, his belt in the other, his pants drop down right before his wife enters. She looks at him in a state of shock.
He just says, “Sometimes things are hard to explain.”
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by Jokes in Levels | May 1, 2025 | Level 3 |
The teacher says, “Why are you late, Joseph?”
Joseph replies, “Because of a sign down the road.”
The teacher says, “What does a sign have to do with you being late?”
Joseph replies, “The sign said, ‘School Ahead, Go Slow!’”
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by Jokes in Levels | Apr 30, 2025 | Level 1 |
Three friends have a good friend. His name is Joe. Joe is a very big optimist. At every bad situation he always says, “This is no big problem. It could be worse.”
His friends don’t like big optimists. So they want to tell Joe a horrible story the next day. They think that Joe cannot find a positive side to this horrible story.
So the next day, only two of his friends come to play golf. Joe asks, “Where’s Gary?”
One of his friends says, “Yesterday, Gary saw his wife in bed with another man, he killed them both, and then he killed himself.”
Joe says, “Well, it could have been worse.”
Both his friends say, “How could it be worse? Your best friend killed himself!”
Joe says, “If it was two days ago, I would be dead now!”
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by Jokes in Levels | Apr 29, 2025 | Level 2 |
A big football fan walks into a bar, hits the table, and shouts, “Give me a Budweiser, or…!”
Scared, the bartender serves the man his Budweiser. This happens every day for a week, and the bartender starts to be nervous and very scared. He asks his wife for advice, and she tells him that he should stand up for himself. Easier said than done, he thinks, but he decides to try it.
The next day, the big football fan returns.
“Give me a Budweiser, or…!”
“O-o-o-o-r-r-r… w-w-what?” says the bartender quietly.
“A small Coke.”
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by Jokes in Levels | Apr 28, 2025 | Level 3 |
A student is talking to his teacher.
The student says, “Would you punish me for something I didn’t do?”
The teacher replies, “Of course not!”
The student says, “Good, because I haven’t done my homework.”
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by Jokes in Levels | Apr 25, 2025 | Level 1 |
A woman is in bed with her lover who is also her husband`s best friend.
They make love for hours and then when they are relaxing in bed, the phone rings. It is the woman’s house, so she answers the phone. The best friend listens. He only hears her side of the conversation.
“Hello? Oh, hi… I’m so happy that you called… Really? That’s great… I’m happy to hear that you are having such a good time… Oh, that is fantastic… Thanks. Okay. Bye, bye!”
When she finishes the conversation, her lover asks, “Who was that?”
“Oh,” she says, “That was my husband. He told me about all the great time which he is having on his fishing trip with you.”
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by Jokes in Levels | Apr 24, 2025 | Level 2 |
My wife came home last night and told me to take off her blouse.
Then she told me to take off her shirt.
Then she told me not to wear her clothes anymore.
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by Jokes in Levels | Apr 23, 2025 | Level 3 |
“Isn’t the principal an idiot!” said a boy to a girl.
“Well, do you know who I am?”asked the girl.
“No,” replied the boy.
“I’m the principal’s daughter,” said the girl.
“And do you know who I am?” asked the boy.
“No,” she replied.
“Thank God!” said the boy with a sign of relief.
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by Jokes in Levels | Apr 22, 2025 | Level 1 |
Mother comes home from a business trip and she asks her little son, “Well, Johnny, how was your life with father when I was away?”
“Everything was fine, mum,” the little boy says. “Daddy took me to the middle of the lake by boat every morning and I swam home alone.”
“Wasn’t it difficult for you to swim?”
“Oh, no, mum, the only problem was that I had to get out of the bag first.”
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by Jokes in Levels | Apr 21, 2025 | Level 2 |
A man and his wife entered a dentist’s office.
The wife said, “I want a tooth pulled. I don’t want any anaesthetics because I’m in a terrible hurry. Just pull the tooth as quickly as possible.”
“You’re a brave woman,” said the dentist. “Now, show me which tooth it is.”
The wife turned to her husband and said, “Open your mouth and show the dentist which tooth it is, dear.”
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